This is a difficult subject for me to talk about, but as you will be seeing pictures in the future from an obviously different location I need to talk about a significant change that has occurred for me, for my team, and for the business.
Right before Ron passed last year, I bought some land and we (Ron and I) signed the mortgage on a new building 3 days before he died. Please know that this is a difficult blog post for me to write. The past few weeks have been enlightening as I finally dig deep to understand feelings I have been having and trying to understand my own behavior. This is a work in progress.
During the past 8 or so months, we've been building a new studio home for Miss Babs Hand Dyed Yarns. We finally moved late last week. The space we have been in was built to handle about 5 people. We have a few more employees than that now and it has been a life of "scuse me", bumping butts, scraping shins on bins and pots, and so on for longer than any of us cares to admit. The new space means that this is no longer happening. We can each have an adequate work space that actually maintains our personal space as well.
It also means that we are no longer on my home property where the business started and grew and thrived thanks to all of you. I was able to be at home all through Ron's last years and available to make sure he was safe and secure. Working from home and keeping our home was a promise I made to him in 2008 when things started getting significantly worse for him, requiring his retirement.
So this change means I will now be driving to work, instead of walking across the driveway. It means that the dogs will come some of the time - they will have a fence and a gated area in the building where they can be without being in the yarn. What I finally figured out in the last few weeks is that while I was able to help plan everyone else's work areas, I couldn't think about my space. I was ignoring that I was avoiding my work spaces, and then it hit me in the face. I am/was having trouble with the whole issue of leaving Ron here. (I know he's dead.) When you've been doing something reflexively for years, it is difficult to change your brain, your habits, your daily routines. And that is what I have been doing.
And all of these emotions explain why I have not wanted to talk about any of this publicly.
But besides all of my personal emotions --
- We have needed a better space to work in.
- I have needed separation from work.
- My employees need a workspace that is not someone else's home and personal space.
Everyone has been wonderful over the years in helping maintain boundaries between home and work, but it just filters in. The coffee pot was in my kitchen, the undyed yarn was in my first studio that was part of the house, the meeting room was my dining room table area, and so on.
In moving to a new location, I do not expect that we will make more yarn, but that it will allow new things to happen. Change simply brings change. We will be trying new dye styles, new color combinations, new projects, and so on. This will happen over time, not all at once. We will not have a retail location at the new studio and expect to continue our policy of no visitors.
This will not be the last time I write of Ron. He and I supported each other without end. He was the person I most trusted in the world, that had my back when no one else needed to or wanted to, he loved me through all that we went through together. His birthday is coming this week and is just one more first I am going through this week. I still can't figure out what to get him for his birthday, never could. So I guess the new studio will have to be it.
Here are some pictures of the new studio.
I love decks and I love windows that really open!
We have a real Break Room!
Yarn waiting to be twisted and labeled!
115 comments
Best wishes on your new space. And, thank you for sharing your feelings during this difficult time. You are an inspiration. I lost my husband 2 years ago and I know the pain you are going through. Please believe that Ron is with you. God bless.
I want to add my voice to the others to thank you for sharing your journey with us.
I am sending Prayers for healing angels to continue to surround you and bring you peace and healing.
The beauty you offer the world is an expression of your love and passion and I hope it continues to nourish you and bring you joy and happiness.
Many blessings.
Bonnie
I wish that you and your staff begin to explore a new found creativity. That will not happen if you stop writing about your husband he is with you every step of the way. Thank you for the lively post.
I know it doesn’t make things any easier, but I too have been there. Losing your other half is something that can’t be explained to someone else. It hurts in places you never even knew you had places. It’s wanted to tell him something then getting slapped in the face that you can’t. It’s picking up the phone to call and say I’m on my way, and realizing you can’t. It’s rolling over in bed and it’s empty.
All that hurts, and hurts deeply. I won’t tell you it gets better, but it does become better managed. The “firsts” are hard, but you will begin to remember the good more than the bad, till one day you can write something like this without crying. As I sit her writing this with tears in my eyes, I’m not there yet, but I know that day will come.
Until it does, know that others are there for you, Those you know very well, and those of us you don’t know. One day at a time, and if that’s too much, one minute at a time.
God Bless.
Thank you so much for sharing this part of yourself. What a hard time. Change is tough, emotions are tough, but you aren’t in this alone. You have a lot of people cheering for you and the entire Miss B team. Xxx